In the waiting room at the University of Colorado Hospital, Chad and Ryan Arnold were being prepared for surgery. Chad had PSC, a disease of the liver for which there is no cure. His condition was fast deteriorating and he needed a liver transplant. The only ray of hope was his brother Ryan whose liver was a perfect match. Overcome with emotion, surrounded by their parents, wives and siblings Chad shared his feelings with Fox 31(Denver News) just before surgery.

“It is a very humbling experience. Ryan called me and said, ‘I’m a match.’ And you feel a lot of things at that point. Relief, gratefulness to God and to Ryan. And after that you wrestle with a lot of guilt, like I really don’t want to bring him through this. But he shut me up pretty fast and said, “Well, you would do it for me, wouldn’t you?”

But things took a devastating turn. The surgery was over. Chad recovered well but Ryan, a healthy husband and father of three little boys died two days after.

Ryan laid down his life for his younger brother. Our calling to extend a helping hand or as they say, to walk the extra mile, may not be as challenging as that of Ryan’s. But we are all called in some way or another to stand in solidarity not only with our loved ones, but also with our neighbours and on a deeper level with our own enemies.
The root ingredient of intimate genuine relationships is built on love. “If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and I have a faith that can move mountains, but have not love, I am nothing” utters St Paul in his letter to the Corinthians. And love is shown more in deeds than in words, says St Ignatius, stressing on effective charity which goes beyond internal sentiment.

But we live in a society which has been transformed into a bubble of chaotic activity where what seems to matter most is the accumulation of wealth to support luxurious lifestyles. We live in a society where we have been trained to view life through the economic lens with a strong tendency to engage only in profit yielding activities. Our sensitivity level towards the immediate needs of an impoverished society is often chocked through our self-absorption. We may tend to concentrate all our energy on the smaller specifics of our life and in the process lose out on the larger perspective.

Just take a look around. But not a quick one. For once let us strive to go beyond that which is within our immediate grasp. Let us reflect on so many of our elderly friends, relatives or parents who are perhaps bed-ridden and who deeply miss our presence. Let us bring to mind our immediate neighbours whom we have deliberately excluded from our social circles perhaps because they fall short of our standards and norms. Let us take a look at the children of broken homes and dysfunctional families who long to be heard and loved. Let us observe the inner cry of a refugee begging for a day’s work. The list is endless. But one thing is sure. We are continually faced with people hungry for genuine love and a bit of compassion.

The spirit of love is manifested in Christ’s own words “And whoever shall compel you to go a mile, go with him two.” What is the spirit of love if not the spirit of sacrifice? It is the spirit of sacrificing self. If someone declares love for a friend, neighbour or country and he or she can’t sacrifice one thing for them, and then such love is pretty shallow. The Lord loves a cheerful giver. He does not want us to give grudgingly; He wants us to do it as unto the Lord Himself. The Lord desires us to give out of love, generosity, and self- sacrifice not only to those whom we fancy but even to those who have in some way or another betrayed us.

As the renowned Bishop Fulton J. Sheen once proclaimed “The divine love is sacrificial love. Love does not mean to have and to own and to possess. It means to be had, and to be owned and to be possessed. It is not a circle circumscribed by self. It is arms outstretched to embrace all humanity within its grasp.”

(THIS ARTICLE WAS PUBLISHED IN PINK MAGAZINE IN 2011 – AUTHOR GORDON P VASSALLO)